Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Feeling Sad...

As is true for many of you, my time online is limited. Every day is a series of compromises because I simply don't have enough time to do everything online that I would like to. So I choose to invest some of those precious minutes in reading the blogs and journals of some of my favorite people. Some of them I have been following for YEARS.

Those people, in particular, I consider friends. It doesn't matter if I've never met many of them. I feel like I probably know them better than even some of their own family members because I've invested so much time in reading their words/thoughts and leaving supportive comments over the years.

As time goes by, I build up a certain level of expectation for my friends. When you care about someone enough to spend a few minutes "with" them every day, you sort of expect that they will reciprocate in some small fashion. My expectations aren't high. I know people are busy and I don't care if they don't visit me or comment for months at a time. People have lives and things happen.

But...and this may sound silly...it hurts my feelings when I visit a journal I've been reading for YEARS and I notice my blog isn't even listed in that person's favorites or other blogs links. There are dozens of others listed. I've noticed many times that some of those links are for blogs where the people don't even post any more.

What does that say to me? "A journal that hasn't been updated in 2 years or more is more important to me than your blog. You don't matter enough to me for me to take the time to add you to my list."

Ouch.

To be fair, I might have caused this same hurt in someone else. As far as I know, anyone who comments regularly in my journal is listed in my Bloglines blogroll (unless they have a private journal). If I have missed you, somehow, make sure you leave a link in comments. I want to make sure I practice what I preach. I love all my bloggy friends. I really really do.

10 comments:

Donna said...

Good reminder! I will add you to my blogger journal. I try to keep my AOL journal friends on my AOL journal, and my blogger friends over at Blogspot. Consider yourself added!

poetmom said...

I know what you're saying. I read your blog all the time but haven't had one myself. Once in awhile I leave you comment, but not all the time. I started reading about you and your life back in AOL journals. I just started a blog so stop on by. I haven't listed my favorite blogs yet, still under construction, but I will.

http://omniacausafuint.blogspot.com

Steph

Two Write Hands said...

I've had the same reaction. It stings just a little, and I totally know where you're coming from.

Unhinged said...

I do most of my blog reading from Google Reader and Feedblitz. I rarely click on my sidebar's links anymore. I forget the links are there!

~Forgetful

Jennifer said...

I feel the same way... so, you aren't the only one...

~Jenn

Donna H said...

Just read this entry and wanted to say that although I may not blog anymore (just getting over some depression stuff) I still like to stop in and check up on the Y family. I miss my proactive days but menopause and depression do strange things to my time.
Try not to take the link thing too personally...I've learned in life that people, for the most part, don't mean to hurt your feelings...much of what they do, or don't do, is more about the baggage they carry or the haze they live in.

Chris said...

Then again, if they have a 2 year old non updated blog on their blogroll and your's isn't,....it could just be that they're lazy on updating their links:) I'm guilty of that sometimes!

Karen Funk Blocher said...

Well, of course you're still in my "some favorites," even though almost everything in there should be labeled, "Some favorites that I really should read more than once every 3 to 6 months!"

Tressa said...

Hey, I just got the new links from a long absence and haven't yet posted them....but I promise as soon as I do....You will be there.. Right near the top just like when you were on aol...I'm just so far behind in everything right now...but I'm working on it...I'm working on it.

http://journals.aol.com/st0rmwhispers/SWAOS/

alphawoman said...

On my AOL jnl I still have SloMo up there. Maybe someday she will return, who knows why she even left. Some shady things were going on for a time over there.