Wednesday, December 29, 2004
At every opportunity, Grandma would purge her home of any and all clutter. This included old photos, and (after my mother left home at 17) all of her cherished childhood mementos - scrap books, year books, school work...anything that my Mom neglected to take with her was tossed out without her permission. Grandma's excuse? "If you didn't take it with you, I assumed you didn't want it anymore."
So for this reason, I had never seen a photograph of my mother as a child. I am sure my grandmother kept a few photos. She was a kind and loving woman and I find it hard to believe that she would throw away EVERYTHING; but I tell you, every time I went to visit her at her apartment in later years she tried to give away anything and everything to me that she thought I might want. Grandma really hated clutter. Still, I had never seen any photos of my Mother prior to, say, 1964.
When I was home over Thanksgiving, I went on a mission to find some old photographs of myself. My mother never throws ANYTHING away, so I knew the ones I wanted were in my parent's house somewhere. The problem is, when you don't throw away ANYTHING, that means you must go through EVERYTHING to find what you want. I spent hours looking through old dresser drawers and closets. By the time I sat on my old canopy bed in my not so old bedroom (I had only spent about 2 years of my life in that room in the last house my parents purchased and finally settled into after 18 years of roaming), I had amassed quite a large pile of yellow Kodak envelopes full of photo prints.
You see, in addition to being a pack-rat, my Mother is also very unorganized. Other than her wedding album, I don't think she has ever taken the time to sort a single photograph into an album of any kind. I had my work cut out for me.
After a couple more hours of flipping through envelop after envelop of photos from my childhood (and finding a few of those elusive pics I was looking for) I came across a white envelope with a rubber band around it. It stood out like a sore thumb against the sea of Kodak yellow. I was stunned and elated to discover a letter from my great-aunt which spoke about cleaning out the home of another great-aunt after she had passed away and enclosed was a BUNCH of little black and white photographs. Apparently, my Grandmother had been sending great-aunt Eleanor batches of photos for years during her frequent clean-out/purge sessions. Eleanor had kept every photo. Many of them were of my Mother when she was a little girl.
There she was, in grainy black and white. The little photos looked like they had been taken with one of those old time brownie cameras. The prints were so small and cute. And you know what? My mother was NOT a homely child. She was adorable! Which begs the question...what happened? Why did she grow up with such a low self-opinion? I may never know the answer (but you KNOW I am going to ask...one of these days).
My little photo expedition was NOT a sanctioned adventure and I knew at any moment my Mother would come up stairs and discover me sitting on my old bed with stacks of photo gold around me. She seems to have some deep seated fear of someone (namely me or my brother) taking some treasured piece of our past from one of her never opened dusty old drawers. Like she would ever notice. You know what? She is right to fear. I quickly took the photos of me that I had been looking for and hid them inside a book I was reading. I scanned the collection of old black and white photos and took my favorites, also stashing them inside my book.
I had just set my book back on the night stand, when the creaky step on the stairway gave me warning that my mother was coming. I painted on an innocent grin as I saw the look of panic on her face.
"What are you doing?!"
Oh, nothing really. I was just trying to find photos of me in my Junior and Senior prom dresses.
I just wanted to show them to some friends of mine.
"Oh. Well...don't take the copies that I have. If you find them, I can have prints made for you."
Um, ok Mom. Thanks.
She sat down with me on the bed and began looking through some of the envelopes. She was sucked down memory lane, just as I had been, and we talked about vacations past and holidays spent in houses both far and near. She came across the white envelope, opened it, (I held my breath) and told me about how her Aunt had saved these old photos for years and how happy she was to have them. They are the only photos left, that she is aware of, of her old house that she grew up in and of her as a child. Whew. She didn't notice the missing ones.
Don't worry. I am going to return them. Now that I have them scanned. Curious? Would you like to see my Mommy as a very little girl? Here she is:
Now I ask you...is that a face only a mother could love? No! I didn't think so either. My mom also used to insist that she was fat as a child. Bah! Her face was charmingly full, but she was no fatty. If you want to see the rest of the photos I swiped, click on the photo of young Carol above to view my Shutterfly album. I really did strike Kodak gold that day.
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
For those with family and friends in southern Asia and for those people who have survived this horrible natural disaster, you have our deepest sympathy. As of this moment, we have donated funds to the following charitable organizations. Please click these images if you would also like to make a donation for earthquake relief.
Sunday, December 26, 2004
AOL just ate my Christmas journal entry, so I will briefly reconstruct.
1. Ty was overjoyed at the sight of his Santa gifts...all was caught on film by John. Video entry to follow later. This was the best part of the day.
2. I nearly ran out of time to bake my contribution to the day's feast, so I scrambled to prepare my potato puffs, pigs-in-a-blanket and other nibbles.
3. We were late in picking up my MIL and hence late to arrive at my BILs.
4. Tyler had NO interest in opening more gifts. He just wanted to play in their finished basement. My MIL was NOT pleased with Ty's reactions to his presents after we forced him to stop playing and open a few packages. What did she expect?
5. My SIL made LAMB for dinner (sucking up to MIL, no doubt. Lamb is her favorite). Who the hell ever heard of having LAMB on Christmas? Bleech! And asparagus, brussel sprouts and stewed potatoes??? Yikes.
6. Tyler ate NOTHING. Not even a roll. All day.
7. Aunt Flo came for a most unwelcome visit. I was not prepared. I should have been, considering my mood all week.
8. Once presents and eating was over, Tyler's mood lifted and he played nicely with his cousins. I was ready for a long winter's nap.
9. Feeling guilty, John stopped at McDonalds on the drive home. I said let the boy go hungry. He needs to learn to eat what is placed in front of him. We won't always be going out to get his favorite foods. I don't want to reward that kind of bad behavior.
10. The last version of this entry was much funnier and much less cranky sounding.
11. I need some Midol and a tranquilizer.
12. Lamb. What the hell! Does anyone have any left over turkey I can have?
13. I am alone. The boys went with my MIL to visit Great Grandma in the nursing home today. 99 years old. Amazing. They are going out for Chinese food after their visit.
14. I'm hungry.
15. I'm tired.
16. I'm cranky.
17. I'm crampy.
18. I'm tired of typing. Merry Christmas all. Nap time. Oh yeah...click the photo below for more pics of our family Christmas, if you're curious. No photos of lamb. Sorry.
Wednesday, December 22, 2004
After getting Tyler set up with dinner on his special car tray, we cruised around checking out my favorite homes in and around town. I had been checking out the houses for a few weeks now and had selected my favorites. Tonight was the perfect opportunity to take photos of them. Tyler really seemed to enjoy nibbling on his chicken nuggets and apple slices while Ooo'ing and Ahh'ing at the pretty lights. He would instruct me to stop and take pictures of ones he liked as well. Click the photo below or HERE to see the best of the best from our little jaunt this evening. I should make a "prize" and go pop it into these folks' mailboxes. They really went all out. It's a joy to see.
Monday, December 20, 2004
Sometimes I swear Tyler just talks to hear himself talk. He jabbers on about the craziest things. We had the following running conversation at Red Lobster the other day. It started with him; "What's that?"
"What's that red thing?"
"What's it do?"
It's the fire exit.
"Oh! So...there's a fire and I yell FIRE and push that thing and alarm goes WOO WOO WOO and run out the door to fire escape and oh no building on fire! call fire trucks to get people out then house burns down and then we go live in a new house. Right Mommy?"
So I start cracking up and he's like, "What funny Mommy? Me?"
"I not funny. I Ty Ty."
Yes you are, son. Yes you certainly are.
Sunday, December 19, 2004
A few more questions have trickled in, so here we go:
1. If you were a vegetable, what would you be and why? Well...I could say one of the lesser liked veggies (less chance of being eaten) but I think I would rather be one that is really useful. Corn. Corn is made into so many useful things and it's the #1 grain that we export to the starving masses overseas. Corn sweeteners (high fructose corn syrup and others), Ethanol (a cleaner burning alternative fuel), Corn oil, Corn starch, popcorn, animal feed, and corn by-products which are made into MANY other things like cleaning products, golf tees, adhesives, batteries, tires, crayons, textiles, antibiotics, aspirin, body lotion, drug coatings, lipstick, and other pharmaceuticals. Oh, and don't forget biodegradable packing peanuts and this cool stuff called Water Lock which is a super absorbent polymer than can suck up 20 times its own weight in water. Yeah, corn. That's the ticket!
2. If you could do anything, be great at it, get paid well for it, and be appreciated for it, what would you be? Oh that's easy. I'd be the next J.K. Rowling (a now famous children's book author widely credited for bringing "reading" back into vogue with today's youth).
3. If you had to choose to be any character in any book/movie/play/show of your choice, but you had to live out that story line forever, who would you choose? Well...Melanie Griffith's character (Tess McGill) in Working Girl rather mirrors my own life...so that makes a sort of logical sense to me. She gets the job, the recognition and the man in the end (and a very GOOD looking man is Harrison Ford too, I must add)... But I somehow think I can do better. Angelina Jolie (Laura Croft) in Tomb Raider. She looks HOT, has oodles of money, a nice house and a cool and exciting lifestyle/hobby. Add a hot looking love interest, and I think that is the way to go.
Comment from danielled1 - 12/18/04 11:06 PM
1) Did you ever drink 'MOXIE'? While I have a lot of moxie, no, I have never personally tasted our nation's first mass marketed soft drink. I was not allowed to have soda as a child and now that I live outside Massachusetts, it's just not very easy to find.
2) Why can you never find Pineapple 'JELLO'? Well...the stocking of particular flavors of Jell-o on your supermarket shelves is driven by purchasing statistics. I'm willing to guess that "pineapple" just doesn't sell well in your area and is, therefore, not stocked. I have it at my local supermarket and will happily ship you some boxes, if you like? OR you can make your own with a packet of Knox gelatin and a cup of canned pineapple juice substituted for the cold water. Don't use fresh pineapple juice. Pineapple belongs to a group of plants called Bromeliads. Kiwi, papaya, and figs are other types of Bromeliads. The enzyme in pineapple juice that is responsible for the breakdown of collagen is bromelin. The process of canning pineapple denatures the bromelin, rendering it incapable of catalyzing the break down of gelatin.
3) And why do you never see baby pigeons? Well firstly, from their earliest origins in Asia, pigeons were cliff-dwelling birds. Today's modern pigeon makes its nest in equally inaccessible locations like on top of tall buildings or in the girders of bridges. Secondly, pigeons are non pareil (they lay only 2 eggs at a time and spoil their babies excessively). Momma and Daddy pigeon will feed their babies until they are completely feathered out. By the time they leave the nest, the are almost the same size as the adults. So, if you see a pigeon that is smaller than the others, he is probably the "baby". But all pigeons pretty much look alike by the time they land on your sidewalk looking for scraps so the only way to know for sure is to keep a coop full on your roof and watch the whole process from the beginning.
Comment from bosoxblue6993w - 12/19/04 8:45 AM
Via email, Ingrid2365 asks:
1. If you could be a holiday, which one would you be? Halloween!
2. Why? I love the costumes, the candy, and the controversy. My mother has always called me a non-conformist. I like to be different and Halloween is the perfect day for that.
3. What is your favorite kind of music? Oh my...now that is a hard question. It's much easier to answer what is my least favorite kind of music (that would be Country and Western). I love SO many different kinds of music it would be hard to pick just one type as a favorite. I love classical, big band, swing, do-wop, rock, hard rock, opera, alternative rock, heavy metal, ska, Hawaiian, punk, easy listening...music from the 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s, and today.
Saturday, December 18, 2004
OK Folks! It's now time to complete the "Three Question Challenge"! I asked you, my lovely readers, to ask me any three questions you liked. Here they are, in the order in which they were received with my responses in RED:
what? Anything I like.
where? Any time I like.
Comment from sdrogerson - 12/10/04 2:15 PM
1. Did he pop any of the balloons? No he did not. We played lots of balloon keepie-uppie, and most of the balloons ended up floating down the steps and into my laundry room...where they remain to this day.
2. Have you tried the sugar-free Hershey's? No. Sugar-free sweets are a blasphemy to me. I just won't do it.
3. Have you picked a name? Yes I have...for a girl. I do not have a backup name for a boy, however.
PS What is the average wingspeed of a fully-laden African swallow? Well, a detailed analysis of an unladen African (and European) swallow can be found HERE. I believe in his alternate theories section, the fully-laden question is also addressed with a coconut being the payload of choice.
Comment from mavarin - 12/10/04 2:29 PM
If you were a super hero...
1. What would your super hero name be? Zaftig Woman
2. What would your super power be, and would you use it for good or evil? I would have the power to bread and deep-fry anything with my eyes; a sense of super-smell that would help me track down my favorite treats with just one whiff, the skill to create delicious masterpieces out of any inedible ingredients, and the ability to mesmerize my foes with the hypnotic jiggle of my blubbery body. I would totally use my powers for good...feed the starving masses and all that.
3. What would your superhero outfit consist of?! Black spandex cat suit (it's slimming, you know) with a hot pink "big shirt" over the top that said Zaftig Woman in big gold glittery letters across the chest.
Comment from sarajanesmiles - 12/10/04 2:43 PM
1. What is your proudest moment? Hmm. Perhaps the day I was promoted from the clerical ranks to my first Management position. Or the day I stood at the altar to marry the man of my dreams in front of all our friends and some of my family. Or the day I sent out my first combo birth announcement/Christmas card to show our beautiful baby boy to the world. Or the time my English professor asked me for permission to publish some of my short stories in the school's prestigious literary magazine...ack It's too hard to pick just one. I felt the same swell of pride in my chest for each of these events.
2. Where would you live if you couldn't live where you are now? Why? If I had a choice? We would move to Maui and live in that cute housing development across the highway from Lahaina. Why? The pretty neighborhood, great weather, proximity to the beach, low stress lifestyle...oh so many reasons.
3. If you had to have one job for a day other than being a SAHM, what would it be? Job for a day, eh? Hmm. I think I would love to be a respected professional photographer assigned to cover the Oscars. All the big stars would want their picture taken by MOI. Yeah. That would be fun.
Comment from valphish - 12/10/04 5:37 PM
1. What is the worst choice you ever made and why? This is a hard one. I like where my life ended up and if I make any changes to my past, things would be very different now. I can say I regret my choice of college (the first one)...I should have gone to school further away from home. I wish I had gone to my friend Kathleen's house to have lunch the day she begged me to come over...but I was having a bad day at work and chose to ignore her pleas. She was gone forever by 2pm that day (read my first journal entry to find out more.) Perhaps my decision to NOT PUT DOWN THE DAMN FORK while I ate my way to morbid obesity? Now there is a bad choice. I'd say that about covers my share of worst choices.
2. If you could do one thing to affect the entire world, what would you like it to be? Hmm. Change the world, eh? Well...for starters, I would like to become a bridge of peace between the extremist factions of the Muslim faith and all other faiths. Learn to live in peace and put an end to terrorism in the name of religion. That would do for a start.
3. What is your favorite possession in the whole world? Well...I love my jewelry. But I don't use/wear it as much as I used to. I love my van. But not as much as I used to love my old Contour. I love my camera...I use that a whole lot. I guess if you go by things that I use every day and LOVE, I'll go with my computer. I couldn't live without it. ;-)
Comment from judithheartsong - 12/10/04 6:15 PM
1) Do you talk to traffic while you're out driving? Letting people know how you feel about their driving, but where they can't hear you. OMG yes...all the time. I yell "Where'd you learn how to drive, bonehead!" or "Get the heck out of my way, you idiot!" and other choice phrases. I've cleaned up my language and hand gestures a TON since Tyler came along. Calling someone a bananahead instead of some other choice 4-letter term isn't quite as satisfying, but I'm making due. ;-)
2) When you need time to yourself, what is one of your favorite things to do? Just like right now...I like sitting in a quiet darkened room and writing in my journal by the glow of my monitor. I also love to sleep or read by myself in bed.
3) Besides your husband and son, are you a huggy/touchy type of person with others? Or do you have boundaries? Your sacred bubble of space. I am a very huggy/touchy person with people I know and love. I tend to be uncomfortable if people I don't know well (or at all) hug me. I do have that "zone" around me. Don't come into my space uninvited. LOL
Comment from poetmom1968 - 12/10/04 8:30 PM
1. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be? Lately I've had a yen to go to Australia.
2. What would you do there? I'd like to see the Great Barrier Reef (go snorkeling), Ayer's Rock, do the bridge climb in Sydney, visit a diamond mine, explore the national parks and hold a koala...stuff like that. :-)
3. What one person would you want with you? My husband, of course. But Tyler has to come with us too. World travel is a GREAT learning experience for kids.
Comment from slowmotionlife - 12/12/04 12:37 AM
why haven't you bought the chocolates yet? LMAO My shopaholic self wants to...soooo badly. But my more reasonable side has successfully talked me out of it (thus far).
Comment from ann7inflorida - 12/13/04 5:41 AM
1. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be? Hawaii (see above). LOL
2. What is one talent you don't have, but wish you did? I would love to be able to draw REALLY life-like sketches. I really admire that sort of "photographic eye". I would also love to be able to play the piano or guitar. Just plop down at a party and play and sing. I always love it when other people do that.
3. What is one personal (just for you) goal you have that is a challenge, but you intend to reach? I intend to finish one of the three college degrees I've started along the way.
Comment from cneinhorn - 12/13/04 8:30 AM
OK! Whew! Last call...any one else have any questions for me? :-)
Thursday, December 16, 2004
My little brother and I would wake on Christmas morning at dawn's first light. My Dad would hear us stirring and he would turn into my favorite holiday character...the Yuletide Nazi. (My apologies to those who may find the term "Nazi" offensive, but I really can't think of any other analogy that comes close to the feeling I want to impart.) Herr Kommandant would order us back to our quarters where we would remain under house arrest until my mother was ready. Why? Because of the home movies.
You see, in order for us to be allowed downstairs to see what Santa had brought us, we first had to have our faces washed, hair combed and my Dad needed to go down stairs ahead of us to set up his camera equipment. My parents wanted to catch every reaction and facial expression on film. My Mother also had to be "ready". That meant her hair needed to be fixed (rollers removed, hair teased, sprayed and coiffed), her face on (cold cream removed, face moisturized, foundation applied, blush, eye makeup, lipstick...yadda), and she had to have a cup of coffee in her hands.
While waiting for our parents to finish their preparations, my brother and I would be doing the pee-pee dance at the top of the stairs. We were nearly frantic and frothing at the mouth to see our tree. It was slow and cruel torture, really. Finally, after nearly three hours, we would get the go-ahead to come down the steps as my Dad would fire up some Christmas music on the HiFi (reel to reel tape deck). We would lunge downward, full speed, and try to shove each other out of the way to be first to see the latest Christmas miracle. Rounding the bend at the bottom of the steps, we would screech to a halt and throw up our hands to shield our faces from the glare of the twin suns my dad had mounted on stalks jutting out from either side of his 8mm home movie camera. Those camera lights were so bright, I seriously think we should have been using SPF30 to protect our skin.
Once the strobing blue spots had cleared from my vision, the tree would finally come into focus. YAY! Santa liked us! He REALLY liked us! We would play with our new toys until breakfast was ready. The wrapped gifts would have to wait until after the breakfast dishes were washed and put away. Dad would get the camera set up on a tripod and we would all take positions sitting around the tree. The wrapped gifts would be divvied out and the paper shredding would commence. My mother would shriek about saving the paper, and my brother and I would gleefully ignore her. We would take turns chasing the dog away (he would try to steal the stringy garlands of popcorn and cranberries my brother and I made every year to decorate the tree).
My dad would sit in his arm chair next to the fireplace and reach for a felt Santa hanging there on a hook in the brick facade. Santa's big belly was actually a pouch that my Dad or Mom would fill with fresh nuts (still in the shell). In Santa's pocket was a nut cracker. Dad would munch on walnuts, almonds, pecans and others while periodically checking the camera's progress. He would shell some walnuts for me, when I asked. He was also poised to lunge and rescue the tree should it suddenly decide to topple over...which it often did. My Mother had a bad habit of putting too many decorations on the front of the tree and not enough on the back to balance.
These are the fond memories. I won't talk about the hours of footage of my Dad screaming at us, me sitting by the tree or running from the room crying, or my Mom crying because my Dad had lost his temper over something stupid like the camera screwing up, or the tape on his reel-to-reel snapping and taking it out on us.
Dinner was always turkey with my Mom's wonderful sage stuffing (very simple and basic...no oysters, sausage or other junk). I would mash the potatoes and help strain the gravy. I also got to rip up the bread and add the stuffing seasonings, set the table and help clear after the meal. Those were my jobs, year after year.
Things changed when we moved into our last house. I was about ready to leave for college. My mother decided to change the style of her holiday decorating. All the cheezy red and green glass balls, plastic icicles, south-western "gods-eyes" and other decorations I remember fondly from my childhood were either packed away or relegated to the back of the tree (for ballast). The Santa nut bag disappeared. The Asian looking Santa and his reindeer we picked up on Okinawa vanished from the HiFi to be replaced by Mom's new "A Christmas Carol" village collectibles.
The nativity scene my Dad made while stationed in Turkey in the early 60s is still put in its place of honor in front of the fireplace. That is now the only object from those early childhood Christmas memories that remains. Dad lovingly hand-painted each ceramic figure himself to send home to his new wife and to pass the time. He wasn't able to be home for Christmas that year. It's the only artistic thing, besides the occasional model plane or boat, I've ever known my Dad to do. They are really beautiful figures.
I would take the baby Jesus out of his manger to play with him when I was a kid. Jesus would become my Barbie's first born. I hand-sewed little diapers for him out of some scraps of white fabric and Jesus would tool around with his new plastic mommy in her Corvette or go camping in her camper and dune buggy. I would always lovingly place Jesus back into his manger before I went to bed each night. I imagined him telling Mary and Joseph about his adventures in the modern world. When I go home for the holidays now, I always spend time sitting on the floor by the nativity and feeling a bit sad for the lambs who are all now missing a leg or two, and touching the chip in Mary's donkey's hoof.
Here at home, I am still trying to decide what our family traditions will be. I know I want to take Tyler out shopping so he can pick out a new ornament each year. I'd love for him to make a garland of popcorn for the tree, but he is still a little young to be playing with sewing needles. I know I won't be making him wait to go see his presents under the tree or for us to be "camera ready". I don't care. All I care is that he knows the true meaning of Christmas and has a really fun day too.
We have a primarily Looney Tunes themed Christmas tree at the moment, with the stockings to match (as you can see below). But the tree is pretty lean. We need more decorations, for sure.
I set up both of my nativity scenes yesterday. "Mine" is on the window sill next to the tree. Tyler's nativity is placed in the spot of honor, in front of the fire place. Just like I remember from my own childhood. Tyler also heard the story of Jesus' birth for the first time yesterday. We sat in front of his Little People's nativity and I acted it out for him. He really seemed to enjoy the story and had lots of "whys" for me when I talked about all the hotels in Bethlehem being full and Jesus being born in a barn. He was excited when I talked about the three wise men bringing birthday gifts to the new baby. He wanted to open them. I'm sure my telling of the story will become more sophisticated as Tyler gets older.
What are your favorite Christmas (or holiday) memories?
Tuesday, December 14, 2004
So...this week's theme is Desktop "Before and After". I had a good excuse to clean my desk up because I had to make room for my new monitor. The old one was a 19 inch monster on top of a monitor riser. The riser had loads of papers and junk under it, next to it...the monitor had stuff piled on top of it. Well...see for yourself. My office is VERY cluttered.
Well, it's not perfect, but it's a big improvement. :-)
Last week's mission was to show a photo of our mode of transportation. Many clever folks took pictures of their feet. I do NOT walk if I can avoid it. Heh. I am a tad exercise phobic. ;-) I didn't have a full photo handy of my rather boring mini-van. But you can see the back end of it in the photo below. The other car was my pride and joy; a Ford Contour (they don't make them any more). It was fully loaded. V6 with leather bucket seats, CD stereo, power moon roof...man I miss that car. But it was just too small for our growing family. I sold it to a very nice woman for her daughter to take to college. What a great mom! I would have killed for a car that nice when I was a teen. Yeesh the clunkers I limped around in...eye sores and scrap metal - the whole lot of them.
So here is my van (I expanded the photo with a pic of the same model/style of van I have) and my old car (now sadly gone). I am already thinking about my next vehicle purchase. We didn't have many options in this van because it was originally a company fleet vehicle (DH bought it from the company when he was downsized). My dream van would have OnSTAR, a GPS system, DVD entertainment system built-in, power sliding side doors and rear lift gate...ahhh! Someday, perhaps.
Sunday, December 12, 2004
A) I am late with the end of last week's Quipster challenge...but the winner (with an 11th hour entry) is Paul (Belfastcowboy75)! His quip "Nothing like a bike and the open road for prostate massage and colonic cleansing." totally cracked me up! Good one Paul! Your turn to select a quipable photo and deadline for this week. :-)
B) Today was Tyler's 3rd birthday party (in more ways than one). He is now 3 AND he has had 3 parties. What a kid. ;-) Photos from the party can be seen HERE. The video is lengthy...no telling when I will have time to edit it and have some fun.
C) My tree is all decorated! Hmm. It looks a little skimpy. I think we need to go shopping for some more ornaments. Or I might just swipe all these super hero action figures Ty got for his birthday and hang them on the tree. ;-) I already have my collection of Looney Tune figures that I got from McDonalds like 10 years ago hanging on there.
D) Back before my Mother got all Victorian "designer" with her Christmas decorating, we had these cool icicles to hang on the tree. They were white translucent plastic. Big deal, right? Here's the kicker! They glowed in the dark! I used to swipe one off the tree, leave it on my window sill all day to get a nice "charge" before bed, and then read under my blanket that night by icicle glow. It was amazing how bright those things were. I need something like that for our tree.
Thursday, December 09, 2004
I want this!
Ooo! Ahh! It's the USB Christmas Tree from ThinkGeek.com! I am going to put it on my desk, on top of my CPU. Holiday spirit in the home office? Check. Now...where can I hide the bill for those chocolates...
Tuesday, December 07, 2004
Fine imported champagne, caviar, truffles, foie gras, delicately smoked salmon...and, of course, chocolate. These items are not frequently sampled in our relatively modest middle-class home (contrary to my seemingly lavish spending, of late). I could SO easily be a wealthy woman. I find the lifestyle very appealing. If only the darn PowerBall lottery would cooperate...but I digress.
On occasion, a delicacy will come to my attention and I will become fixated for a time. I am consumed with the desire to buy, cherish and hog this item all to myself. MINE! You can't have any! Ahem. Such an item has been taunting me; haunting my every waking moment since I first saw the pretty gold embossed catalog in my mail announcing it's impending arrival at one of my favorite shops. What is it, you ask? What is this delectable morsel on the forefront of my brain, keeping me awake at night? Look at the glory that is...THE G COLLECTION:
Oh, people. Godiva has really done it this time. Not only is this chocolate gorgeous to look at, but I can just imagine its succulent flavors melting on my tongue. And that BOX! Rare East African Wenge wood and vanilla birch inlays...stunning! My credit card finger is itching to punch in those memorized digits and order me up one of these $350 indulgences. Ulp. Yes, $350 for a box of chocolate. I'm crazy. Seriously. Nuts to even consider it. No, I haven't ordered it...............yet.
Monday, December 06, 2004
On a bright Hawaiian Christmas Day,
That's the island greeting that we send to you
From the land where palm trees sway,
"Um, yeah. I really WISH I were in Hawaii right now..."
Here we know that Christmas will be green and bright,
The sun to shine by day and all the stars at night,
Mele Kalikimaka is Hawaii's way
To say "Merry Christmas to you."
"My tree is up, but green and bright it ain't. I wanted to shove this tree up my husband's butt at one point today."
Oh man, what a day. I am beginning to think that a REAL tree would be easier to manage than this 7 foot tall artificial monstrosity I have jammed in my front window.
Firstly, my husband insists the only place we have to store this thing is the crawl space under the house. Bless his heart, he wiggles under there year after year to retrieve the huge box he jams the tree parts into. He yanks the parts out, works his way through the mine field we call basement, up a half-flight of steps and he hucks the assorted, mangled tree parts in my general direction. His mood as he does this? Warm with Christmas Spirit? Hell, no. He is muttering curses no self-respecting sailor would utter and complaining every minute about how the whole process of tree retrieval SUCKS.
Secondly, after having assorted simulated tree parts hucked at me, I now have to sort the pile of mangled limbs into piles, by size. They look like they have been attacked by wolverines. These branches used to be color coded. Unfortunately, years of cramming into too small a storage box and jammed into a crawl space seems to have flaked off many of the color code indicators. Joy!
Thirdly, they made the needles on this pseudo-evergreen TOO dang real. I have oodles of little cuts and abrasions on my fingers, wrists, arms and legs from trying to bend the twisted mess back into a sort of tree shape.
Fourthly, once I finally assemble the beast, I am again reminded that this tree is WAY to big for my tiny living room. *sigh* So I rearrange the furniture and tree to try and make enough room to walk past without cutting your legs or tripping into the fireplace. Egad that thing is HEAVY.
Fifthly, I drag out the tangled mess that is the lights for the tree. Flopping on the floor, I try and find an end to the twisted mess on my lap. Two sets of colored lights are non-functional. One set only half lights. The remaining strand of annoying blinking colored lights will be banished to a bush or tree OUTSIDE. Thankfully, I have two working strings of pretty white lights for the tree. Now if I can keep Tyler away long enough to untangle and install them... He is into everything and getting on my already frayed nerves. Poor kid only wants to help.
Lastly, I trip and struggle around the tree and fling the lights around it's massive girth. Just enough lights. Done. Now I can sit and enjoy the beauty of this illuminated vision, right? No. All I can think about is grabbing three Tylenol and a big glass of water for my aching back and cramping gut. (Did I fail to mention my Aunt Flo came to call yesterday?) Ugh.
At some point during this fiasco, my husband has turned on some Christmas music. When it finally registers, I find myself adding commentary to the strains of "It's The Most Wonderful Time of The Year". "Oh yeah? Well not in this house, bub."
Anyone want an abused, but still in good shape, artificial Christmas tree? It will be at our curb probably some time in March. That's about how long it will take me to work up the gumption to remove all the decorations, un-rig the lights and take that monster apart. I'll tell my husband to wait in the front yard so I can huck it at him and he can relocate it to roadside. No more crawlspace, honey. I'm done. Next year we'll just chop down the spruce at the corner of the house.
Saturday, December 04, 2004
Ty had a great day yesterday. It started with a hallway full of balloons to run through the moment he woke up. His first birthday gift of the day was waiting for him at the end of the balloon gauntlet. He got Caillou's Tree Fort. My friend Kim also sent him a Max & Ruby DVD. It took a lot of convincing to get him away from his "pretend Gilbert is stuck in the tree and Caillou rescues him" game so we could go out for lunch at his favorite play place. Since having his party at Time In didn't work out (we've changed to Chuck E Cheese for the convenience of his cousins' schedule), lunch at Time In was a great idea. No fights with the other kids this time. ;-)
After Time In closed for the day (we stayed as long as they let us), then it was off to buy a little cake. His special Spiderman cake will be ready for his party next week, but they had these cool superhero candles at the market. We grabbed three of them (makes sense, right?) and headed for home. Tyler wanted cake immediately, so we had to talk him into at least eating his leftover lunch. He takes after his mom. Why eat chicken when there is CAKE?!
The cake was delish, as always. I love the ShopRite bakery. The finale to the evening was the new (used) Sega John got off Ebay to replace the one Ty broke a few weeks ago and a TON of new driving games. Yay Daddy! They were age appropriate too. Not always easy to find these days. So Daddy and Ty video gamed the evening away and because Ty had no nap, he passed out at 8pm. So did Mommy!
If you want to see the day's events in photos and video, you can see my latest video production HERE. I recommend a high speed internet connection. It's a 5MB file. Give it a mo to load then press the play button. I had a blast with this one. I am getting quite proficient with this video editing package (Pinnacle Studio8). [big grin]
Friday, December 03, 2004
Thursday, December 02, 2004
* Tyler tidbits that tickled me today...
"Mommy! I been dere before!"
"Where honey?" I looked up with interest. Tyler was watching a commercial for a local jewelry store. Yes, he HAD been there before. I couldn't believe he remembered. "Why did you go there, hun?"
"To get Mommy a pwesent! ...but you don't like it anymore."
"Aww honey, that's not true! I LOVE the present you picked out for me!"
"Den why you never wear it?"
He's got me there. It's a locket (you can check it out in my June 21st anniversary post). It's been sitting on my desk for months waiting for me to put photos in it. "I'm sorry honey, I want to put a picture of you in there first."
"So do it! Pwint one. You know you cried when I dave dat to you. Why you cry?"
"Because, sweetie, I was so happy. It was the most beautiful present I ever saw and it just made me cry with happiness." I still can't believe he remembered the jewelry store, the gift, the fact that I haven't worn it, AND that I cried when I got it. Amazing. Going to print those photos out ASAP.
* We lost our power in a major wind storm today. What does this mean? No cooking for me! Yay! So at Red Lobster this evening...
Just after we placed our dinner order, John took Tyler for a little exploratory walk around the restaurant. This is our standard distraction technique in a place where we know the meal is going to take longer than an hour. Plus Red Lobster has tanks of fish and the BIG tank of Maine lobsters. Mmm. Lobster. That was MY plan for the evening menu. I got the artichoke and lobster dip, and a lobster tail added to my dinner of assorted other seafood. The boys came back just after the appetizer arrived.
"Mommy! I have a new best friend!"
Yup. Tyler apparently befriended one of the lobsters in the tank. This lobster was paying attention to Tyler and trying to climb out of the tank way more actively than the any of the other lobsters. Ty took this as a sign that the lobster wanted to be his friend. So cute! I didn't think much more about it as Tyler discovered he loved the corn chips that came with my dip. Yay! He is so freakin picky sometimes.
Salad came (with veggies and dip for Ty...I love Red Lobster's new healthy choices on the kids menu). Then dinner. As the waitress placed the dish with my Maine lobster tail on the table, Tyler got a look of horror on his face and screamed:
"Oh no!!! MOMMY! YOU'RE EATING MY BEST FRIEND?!?!"
Oh dear. I had to do some FAST talking. There was another lobster in the tank that apparently was acting aggressively toward the others. He was head butting them and being generally obnoxious. So Daddy did a fast save by saying I was eating the trouble maker. They only cook the naughty lobsters. ... I know. Don't say it.
This seemed to mollify Tyler and we finished our meal. On the way out, we paused at the tank so Ty could say goodbye to his new "friend". Uh oh. Where was Tyler's friend? Yup. He was GONE. Now...the restaurant wasn't very crowded and I suspect not many people went for the lobster that night. What are the odds? Oh man, I felt so guilty!! John did some fast talking again and said that Ty's pal must have gone swimming in another tank someplace else in the restaurant. Ty seemed content with that. Ouch. Bad Mommy moment.
* I made a startling discovery while at Barnes and Noble the other night. One of my all time favorite book series (which ended in the main character DYING) now has a new sequel series starting. Anyone ever read Stephen R. Donaldson's The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever? I read the series during my high school years. I got the box set as a Christmas gift. It's amazing to me that my parents succeeded time and again to find great books I had never read before to place under the tree. The last book in the series had been published in 1977. Well guess what! 27 years later and Donaldson has resurrected this great Land and story line. Now I have The Runes of the Earth (The Last Chronicles of Thomas Covenant, Book 1) in my hot little hands. No telling when it will actually make it onto my night table where my pile of prioritized must reads are stacked. This one may just pre-empt some of the others. I really need to stay out of book stores. I have more books NOW than I can ever finish reading in my lifetime.